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I suppose I hurt back then but I couldn’t feel that pain, not like now. I was listless, didn’t have the energy or inclination to do anything. I went on to automatic pilot, drifting aimlessly and pointlessly through days and nights. Quite pathetic for a man of fifty-eight years. Perhaps the torment was greater this time because I knew Gaynor was only a few miles distant, a phone call or text or e-mail away. I knew where she lived, where she sat and slept. But she eluded my fingertips and my eyes. She was a real flirt.Anyway, we were having a "going away" party... Although neither of us is moving very far away. My son was talking with a group of people. Three were friends of mine... In their fifties, married for many years. There were a couple of young people, too. Anyway, he and one of the old guys were gabbing about my well being... As if I couldn't exist by myself. My son just finished stating that maybe "they" ought to inform the brothels, over in Nye county, that I was a widower. ”“So, what stopped you doing that?”“I fell in love with you instead. I don’t have that much experience with guys, but you blew me away. Right from that very first evening at the Italian restaurant, I was awestruck. You were… you still are… the most amazing man I’ve ever met. And you were still incredibly good looking. Even more than in this photograph. You’ve got better with age.“And you fell in love with me, too. It was totally genuine between us; you must believe that. But it gave me a real. " She admitted. " ... I just kind of wondered what it would be like, having a different man screw me while you watched and perhaps, have me watch you with another woman." So, you don't want to mess around with the woman then?"I didn't say that. I think it might be nice to try. I have wondered once or twice, what it felt like for you when you lick me and I can think of only one way to find out."We finished the dishes, put them away and made a cup of tea to take into the lounge. I was thinking,.
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